It's Time to UPGRADE Your FRIENDS - Say Goodbye! - #SundaySermon - 013

but that's an old wineskin guys it's an old wineskin you update your software you wait update your phone you update your computer you update your dress styles you update your car you update things we need to update our friends we need to update those who are around us we need to find people that we can be radically transparent with we need to find people that where we can be completely naked so that you can be the best you and the only way to be the best you is allow yourself to be honest with other people there by helping you get over your own ego and be honest with yourself I've built many startups most of them the face of Bitcoin is exactly the place that I like to be we're gonna end it right there [Music] well welcome to Sunday sermon [ __ ] it's

time to get started today Sunday sermon guys is on reviewing your relational Network on reviewing your relational network let's go back to high school let's go back to middle school right in high school middle school even college you just gravitated towards certain types of people and in many ways you naturally gravitated towards different groups of people within the twenty you know a 12-month calendar year especially in those more formative years of middle school in high school you know you went I remember the the trends back in the days going from from certain type of genes let's just say with some sort of elastic thing at the bottom where the ankle is at towards straight leg jeans to oh there's this real cool thing with flared out and then there was a really cool another one that came came that was like a stovetop some of

y'all [ __ ] don't know what I'm talking about but when it came to Jesus tiles man that was very much on point Jenko is [ __ ] absolutely stovetop Pants [ __ ] I mean man then you go through the Ralph Lauren period and they sagging that [ __ ] gotta have more [ __ ] pant leg at your ankles than actually up Dodd's guys man I was very much very much a part of of gene culture here's the thing though I don't have any style now I've never really had style but I just I just watched patterns I just see [ __ ] happen so I I you know I tried to participate a couple times in Jean culture and it just it didn't work out actually to be quite frank I had a moment last year where where I was wearing some

I mean he trust me the jeans that I was wearing ain't nothing to write home about either your basic ass what'swhat's that Levi's their basic Vega basic ass Levi Levi jeans a little short a little too short because I wear it at my waist it's an interesting idea some of you young young bloods up in here but actually wearing your pants at your waist is like it's a thing and so I was in this I was in this I was in the airport I was in that the Atlanta Airport and I was at I was trying I I lose two things more than anybody else I lose sunglasses and I lose ear ear ear buds your earphones because I'm traveling all the time so I'm there's there's a 25% chance when I go to a city I'm probably gonna be leaving something there it's probably

a thing and so I was in this I was in this I was in the airport I was in that the Atlanta Airport and I was at I was trying I I lose two things more than anybody else I lose sunglasses and I lose ear ear ear buds your earphones because I'm traveling all the time so I'm there's there's a 25% chance when I go to a city I'm probably gonna be leaving something there it's probably gonna be headphones a cord charger it's gonna be something it's sunglasses too so that's why I have a [ __ ] ton of sunglasses that I all got for free but anyway I was in the store because I had recently lost some headphones I wanted to get some more and I was talking with the guy big [ __ ] and he was he was a cool dude

and we were talking about what it facetious nikko rocking that yen bro my man that's what's up no that's Honda's see I don't need a [ __ ] store I'll let you guys do whatever you want take our logos sell them take our products sell and take our videos rip them use them we got one guy's in discord who does that Corey is he here today you here today Corey Corey's not in here so if Ulysses this I'm he's gonna know that I'm talking about Corey took all of our [ __ ] and ripped it in new podcasts and I said bro do it take the money you earned it see you understand the go guys the goal is he's putting in that work and he's gonna make money Rhys indicating all our [ __ ] into podcasts good I hope you make a [

__ ] ton apparently according to the podcast statistics podcasts are only going up so I hope that he makes a lot of money but he's spreading the message he's spreading the gospel guys he's spreading the gospel so I don't care if you make money off of me spreading the gospel do it because that's why I'm giving it to you guys so you guys can use when I got the little that I got to hopefully help you get to the next place you want to go so anyway I was talking with him and something got I'm talking about my shoes because he liked my shoes you like my shoes that was it yeah you like my shoes because of these these adidas you know air things and and I said yeah man they actually looked yeah they're really comfortable to help me you know with workout

and all that stuff and they're really good for on-the-go and I'm I'm walking around all the time and actually what's nice is they is my jeans I guys okay see this is just being honest with you I said something to the effect of well you know it's nice because it my jeans fall well on it or something like that this is something that literally is something I would have said [ __ ] back in in in middle school like do my jeans fall well and these kicks brah do these jeans fall well do I got a wrinkle so I literally said something like that I said like well they're jeans fall well on his like he looked at me and this is a brother okay he looks at me straight in the eye he goes bro no no those jeans naw I was [ __

would have said [ __ ] back in in in middle school like do my jeans fall well and these kicks brah do these jeans fall well do I got a wrinkle so I literally said something like that I said like well they're jeans fall well on his like he looked at me and this is a brother okay he looks at me straight in the eye he goes bro no no those jeans naw I was [ __ ] Mohawks [ __ ] mortified guys I was [ __ ] mortified you have no idea I looked at this brother and I was like damn bro like you could have said mother [ __ ] you ugly and I'd be like I but I mean he said there was genes bra no ah not like this so anyway that's just a long way of winded story telling you

about my jean fashion my Jean fashion but let's get back to let's get back to the central idea we went into this from high school college you go through multiple phases you go through multiple stages in middle school high school college you you gravitate towards certain people and that pick up your fancy and [ __ ] go through goth periods do you remember that punk rock periods I'd go through gangster rap RZA D rap gangsta rap periods I I had [ __ ] go through all sorts of different periods by the way looking back at the metal level we're all promoted by the mainstream media congratulations mockingbirds but you naturally gravitated towards people and those people influenced who you were for good or for bad and I'm sure you can conjure up some stories I'm sure all y'all can conjure up some stories about terrible

situations in which you found yourself regrettable situations in which you found yourself and the reason you were there is because you weren't a leader you were a participant and you participated with those individuals they dragged you down they they they they convinced you however they did to be a participant in something that would never end well but oh the laughs would get if it did these relationships you pragmatically empirically heuristic aliyou understand the power of relationships oh I don't need to talk to you about that and what I mean like we were saying it talking about before one of the things I love about discord and what I've learned about you guys is that I get to grow that relationship with you this is a wonderful journey and I'm enjoying every moment of it because you guys are engaging with me and actually saying what's

up but let's fast-forward you've changed haven't you oh you've changed you've changed your home you've changed your location you've changed your your your your values your morals your principles you've changed I don't believe in the the the what's that quote that people say people don't change some [ __ ] like that [ __ ] that [ __ ] you know what people don't change you know what that really signals to when someone says people don't change what they are signaling at is themselves they are projecting their own life and here's the thing you'd say well Peter why are so many people say that then why do so many people say that people don't change do the math the reason that people say that is because the vast majority of people don't change are there any pics of the goth no sword I never went goth

that really signals to when someone says people don't change what they are signaling at is themselves they are projecting their own life and here's the thing you'd say well Peter why are so many people say that then why do so many people say that people don't change do the math the reason that people say that is because the vast majority of people don't change are there any pics of the goth no sword I never went goth I never went goth guys I never went goth I have pretty much been in terms of those like styles of [ __ ] I was always alternative in what I the way that I said I think of alternative is probably a lot different from how you guys understand alternative but when I say alternative it means I I would listen to anything and I would put on anything

that I just felt was comfortable which is why this brother in Atlanta Airport looked at me and said to my face plainly those genes brah no guys I just wear what's comfortable owl I'm an old [ __ ] man I'm an old man guys so you've changed let me take a sip of this shorty so we don't need to talk about the facts that you've changed well you've changed your home your location your your values your morals your standard your principles you've changed your life in many ways and in many ways the reasons why is because you were a participant I don't think I need to spend time talking with you guys about the value lessness of being merely a participant all of these sermons that we've been talking about is about [ __ ] taking control of your life and looking at the larger

game at play making the informed decisions to change I wore fanny pack [ __ ] active block I wore fanny packs all the way up to the time that I was living in consulting in Korea in Korea I mean I probably wore a fanny pack every bloody day when I was living in Korea State Eurasian you know what it's [ __ ] comfortable and is highly pragmatic we want to surround ourselves let me just cut to the chase we want to surround ourselves with people that really want to make you or help you be the best you this is a sticky topic because it requires requires candor it requires assertiveness and it requires initiative miss the choirs your ability to speak plainly and honestly about what has happened and while why things might need to change now please take all of this with a grain

of salt because I have no context to the relational dynamic and the complexes that play when it comes to you and some of the individuals that you have relationships with I do not know of the commitments you've made the promises you've made the assumptions that are there and maybe even some of the requirements that keep you in the position which you are in notwithstanding even compromises and so please take everything I'm saying with a grain of salt but that I don't think that qualifier removes any of the value of considering some of these ideas you guys are still on those [ __ ] fanny packs guys dad go I'm telling you it's like herding cats guys you want to surround yourself with people that help you be the best you in that particular stage in which you're in right now and one of the things

so please take everything I'm saying with a grain of salt but that I don't think that qualifier removes any of the value of considering some of these ideas you guys are still on those [ __ ] fanny packs guys dad go I'm telling you it's like herding cats guys you want to surround yourself with people that help you be the best you in that particular stage in which you're in right now and one of the things that I was thinking about I was and I was considering this idea for today's sermon is discord chat you guys are helping me be the better me I want to be you guys are engaging with me you guys are helping me see the market more clearly you guys are my tap my life into the community of cryptocurrency yes can we sometimes seem even in this small group

like sometimes an echo chamber but not really I think there's I think we attract a certain type of people we attract people are ok with just saying the dirty [ __ ] talking about life the way it is no pretense here we out [ __ ] drinking like grilling with guns showing off his fanny pack listening to the doors Lord talk I'm show you guys pictures of head shots of squirrels and chipmunks I'm [ __ ] blowing away like [ __ ] you know Rambo [ __ ] this is my house but you guys are helping me be the person I want to be and you say well Peter what is that what do you want to be here's my answer to you and it's very specific I want to be completely honest all the time you guys are a grand expand I've talked about

this before so some of you guys this might be a replay but this discord this YouTube this this is this putting it all out there is yes kimchi some people have been here since day one thank you kimchi that's it I don't think a lot of people caught that kimchi but that's exactly how I ended my blogpost when I took the dive into this world is I said I'm going to be my promise to you reader is that I will be radically transparent because I'm a liar guys I'm a cheat I'm a swindler I'm everything and more have I been honest with you guys since we've begun absolutely haven't been that way most of the my adult life absolutely but I see that as one of the hardest things to do and it's not just how you present yourself it's not just how you what

you what you say it's what you do it's what you do when no one's looking sometimes not often but sometimes I have an opportunity to talk with other young young adults having children I say young adults these [ __ ] are like me [ __ ] close to 40 [ __ ] what am I talking about young adults we are still young adults what am I talking about we're still young adults anyway so my friend who's in his mid-thirties just had their first kid and we were got talking about how do you raise kids and I said there's it's very simple there's three ways to raise kids the first is do as I say not as I do that's your first option do as I say not as I do I think it's pretty obvious that that's not a good answer the second way of

about we're still young adults anyway so my friend who's in his mid-thirties just had their first kid and we were got talking about how do you raise kids and I said there's it's very simple there's three ways to raise kids the first is do as I say not as I do that's your first option do as I say not as I do I think it's pretty obvious that that's not a good answer the second way of raising children is do as I say not as I do in private if kids are smarter than that they will find out what you do in private because they're gonna be in your home if you're unlucky fill 18 they're gonna find out who you really are dead who you really are mom that's what family's for family is for abject experimentation on life with some powerful way that

the family unit what no a family unit creates is some social familial genetic I don't bond where they saw you when you was naked brother they saw your little peen all right they brought you into this world they saw you go through your goth phase they saw you go through your rap stage thank God we saw you going through the hell you heavy metal than the punk rock then then then the Elektra of Goa house trance progressive house [ __ ] I mean and then they saw you somehow [ __ ] not kill yourself but somehow you graduated high school they saw you do the stupidest [ __ ] and you know what in many cases if you're lucky your parents were there to get you out of that [ __ ] when you done [ __ ] up that's what family is family is

the idea is the the the object example of radical transparency and experimentation all in the same boat they got to see you experiment your ass to the moon and back they also saw you experiment your ass to the depths of hell and back because you were a child you were a kid it were a young adult and they still love you if you're lucky if you blessed but it's it's that's what family is family is radical transparency family is experimentation and when I hope that some of you guys especially for those who haven't just popped in today for the first time but welcome if you hear but if you've been with me for a while now you know that's what I want to create I want to create as I say create I want to be a part of a family of radical transparency a

family who does I don't care if you curse I don't care if you say racial [ __ ] I don't care if you say on PC [ __ ] I'm just glad you're here sister I'm just glad you're here brother he's the only commonality that we have to have is that we believe that independent sovereignty over your own life an independent sovereignty over your own value is one of the highest and greatest achievements that we can succeed in having in this life if you agree with me there then brother sister I'm with you I want to hear it all and I want us to change each other I want us to improve each other this is Sunday sermon guys I want us to iron sharpens iron and so I don't want us to in a in fact affect affect each other positively and do it

one of the highest and greatest achievements that we can succeed in having in this life if you agree with me there then brother sister I'm with you I want to hear it all and I want us to change each other I want us to improve each other this is Sunday sermon guys I want us to iron sharpens iron and so I don't want us to in a in fact affect affect each other positively and do it without censorship and do it with radical transparency I don't care how you talk I'm just glad you're talking herpes with absolutely brother if you've been hears let's just get let's just get to the end of this cuz I have some other ideas I want to talk about but you know I'm get to we'll go all over the place but let's just go straight to the meet here

we go my desire is to be radically transparent I promised that to my readers in March when I told the world that I would do this I love that I can be absolutely honest all the time I love it it's wonderful I do not have to censor myself when I get into corporate America I do I still drop f-bombs I still say [ __ ] and I don't wear a suit and you and I only wear a collared shirt that's as far as I'll compromise and where my my terrible ass jeans and my shitty ass shoes but they comfortable guys hey when you're on your feet all day don't give me [ __ ] surround yourself with people that improve that transparency surround yourself with people that can that you can be radically transparent with because when you can be radically transparent with them they

can forgive all things just like your parents forgave all things raising your stank-ass don't janky-ass your your [ __ ] you know golden spoon in the mouth ass they have they can forgive all things got not like this not like this you must find people to surround yourself that help you become the better you and the only way that you can become a better you is to find people that you can be radically transparent with I get it guys I get it I get the value of having old friends it's legit it's great to talk about the old good old days the Bruce Springsteen days of you know it's good I get it I love Bruce from [ __ ] Springsteen old friends are legit but that's an old wineskin guys it's an old wineskin you update your software you wait update your phone you

update your computer you update your dress styles you update your car you update things we need to update our friends we need to update those who are around us we need to find people that we can be radically transparent with we need to find people that where we can be completely naked so that you can be the best you and the only way to be the best you is allow yourself to be honest with other people thereby helping you get over your own ego and be honest with yourself I don't mind sob stories I've heard my fair share behind closed doors in multiple different mediums I get it I love to understand where you're coming from I get the sob story you don't need to be sob story and all the time now you're just utilizing people but speak frankly be intentional and have those

you is allow yourself to be honest with other people thereby helping you get over your own ego and be honest with yourself I don't mind sob stories I've heard my fair share behind closed doors in multiple different mediums I get it I love to understand where you're coming from I get the sob story you don't need to be sob story and all the time now you're just utilizing people but speak frankly be intentional and have those difficult conversations you want to know one of the best ways to be honest with yourself is to have those this tough conversation with a friend or someone within your network or someone that you have - that you are in invariably influenced by that you know is not allowing you to be your best self you might find that merely talking to them about how you're not able to

speak plainly in front of them might be the best thing for your relationship it is fascinating when I as a consultant and as a coach on site with with these clients is where I will speak plainly and it's like I have a disease and the disease is brother you bring it up [ __ ] it's like yeah is that what y'all pay me so much yeah but you know it's like you know what my job is to help you improve the way that you build software that's my job and part of that job I have to say it's a nasty [ __ ] sometimes I have to say literally to managers face the following words you my friend not like now I don't say it with that type of that disdain in my mouth but I'll essentially say my friend you have a very aggressive

very aggressive agate engagement pattern and unfortunately it's clearly seen that the way that you behave within these meetings fundamentally changes the behavior patterns of everyone else in which they no longer feel safe to share plainly about how we can approve our software development it is important that you recognize this so that we can have conversations around how we can improve this engagement pattern you the response is always the same it's always the same it's a Peter man Wow I I've never thought of my you know the way that I engage is a aggressive I don't want to be aggressive and then I look at a messy you're right I know you don't neither do i but we're in agile in part of Angela's we retrospect and I talked with the team and I understand where their constraints are not merely from a technical infrastructural or

architectural standpoint when we understand the relational constraints the relational issues why we can't get [ __ ] done and part of that is the way that you engage with the team you are a highly aggressive individual and let's talk about it that's Peter post-punk no that's Peter when I was about 200 hours act problem about 200 pounds so I'm a lot lighter now thanks to Bitcoin big takes the Bitcoin I'm a lot lighter than that guys a balloon title yeah well [ __ ] it's time to lean up bitcoins on sale guys and so you say well what was that all about what was that all about here you go one of the best ways to practice your the truth that you desire one of the best ways to practice the transparency that you desire so that you can improve your life is you have

takes the Bitcoin I'm a lot lighter than that guys a balloon title yeah well [ __ ] it's time to lean up bitcoins on sale guys and so you say well what was that all about what was that all about here you go one of the best ways to practice your the truth that you desire one of the best ways to practice the transparency that you desire so that you can improve your life is you have to have the first difficult conversation with an individual or entity in your life about why it's hard to work with them why it's hard to communicate with them why it no longer is working my man why it is no look what longer working my friend why this is a burden for me now why this needs to change you might find that it might improve your relationship with

that individual merely because you're finally not a hack and you woke the [ __ ] up and you finally brought the elephant in the room and actually talked about it conversation difficult is needing hand to face could be the first conversation you need to have is with yourself well if you have that I that III Grillin with gun says the first conversation she need to have is with yourself I agree with that I can also see that your mind is very powerful and talk you out of doing it sometimes you just need to [ __ ] do it and so you might say well Peter I'm highly independent who are these jingles who are these friends that you speak of I don't have any well welcome to the show neither did my brother or I we have we have very we don't have a lot

of friends we're highly independent but here's the thing though there's one thing that John and I have to concede is that the only reason that John and I are doing our best work because we're working with our best with their wives our best friend but I guess our close next to best friend womb [ __ ] brother brother brother brother brother I was trying to get that out guys by trying to do it in a bad accordian accent brother brother brother right not sure what that means bro he's my [ __ ] broham guys diversity is key absolutely absolutely John are John and I are like oil and water we Britain we Britain guys we are allowed to do our best work because John and I know each other we can be we can be radically transparent with each other and offend each other week

Li we have tough conversations with each other week ly this is a something that it will never end guys this is something that will never end and I'll tell you it's not fun going through it I [ __ ] hate arguing with this [ __ ] it's time to update it's time to level up it might be time to have that conversation with someone to talk about why [ __ ] needs to change if you're highly independent you have one option are you still doing your best work let's be honest are you still doing your best work I think you know what the answer is especially if you're highly independent sometimes you need someone else to help you get to the next level sometimes you might need to reach out to that individual that you know that can help you upgrade level up [ __

why [ __ ] needs to change if you're highly independent you have one option are you still doing your best work let's be honest are you still doing your best work I think you know what the answer is especially if you're highly independent sometimes you need someone else to help you get to the next level sometimes you might need to reach out to that individual that you know that can help you upgrade level up [ __ ] [ __ ] it hook that [ __ ] so enjoy it [ __ ] I know who you is not like this guys if you want to if you're highly independent consider it simply ask yourself the question am i stealing am I still doing my best work the answer is no then you need to find someone that you can trust that you can talk to you

can beat radically transparent to so that you can level the [ __ ] up so it's about culling relationships it's about reviewing relationships it's about considering who you're surrounding yourself with because those people invariably influence who you are and I get enough feedback I'm getting enough feedback from you guys independently to help me know that I am being good to those who have chosen me I appreciate you guys so much for choosing me and so I desire to do my best to be good to those who've chosen me you might have to have a conversation with someone that's relatively rough but I promise you it'll change your relationship always for the better even if that includes them leaving if you're highly independent ask yourself simply the question am I still doing my best work if not it's time to level up [ __ ] it's

time to go big time it's time to find someone to help you go if you if you care about that of course the last but not least man be good to those who just you've chosen to be your friend so I hope that I'm being the best friend that I can be in this relationship of sorts you guys are helping me level up and I appreciate it bottom of my heart but relationships are intentional relationships take time and I'm glad you guys are here [Music] [Applause] [Music]